Wednesday, December 22, 2010

An Open Letter to Bruce Boxleitner

Dear Mr. Boxleitner-

I'm certain you don't remember me, but that's fine-you've done a lot of publicity tour stuff recently and you aren't expected to remember every single person who asks a dumb question at a panel. But if you're one of those Marilu Henner types, I was the lady in Toronto who asked you what it's like to have an action figure of yourself, and you gave me a very flirty answer. I was elated.

This shared moment however is not why I'm writing.

I'm writing to let you know that I did my best to fulfill the promise I made to you at the Toronto Fan Expo 2010. You were discussing box office opening weekend grosses, and you said "Please, everyone here, do something for me. Go see this movie twice opening weekend. No, actually, go four times-see it four times opening weekend." We all applauded and made it clear that this was our plan, and we would not fail you. After all, you fight for the users so we can fight for you, right? We all left that room even more impatient for TRON Legacy that we had been going in, most of us plotting how to cram in as many viewings as we could the weekend of December 17th.

Fast forward to December 12th. TRON Legacy is opening in less than a week, and I'm as excited for this as a child is for Christmas morning. I've been quite the TRON geek for many years, but this is obvious-I was at the panel after all. Anyway, it's 5 days until the premiere and I seem to have contracted the plague. Sneezing, coughing, chest aches, all of it. And as the 5 days dwindle to just one, I just keep getting sicker to the point where the day before the midnight showing (for which I pre-ordered tickets) I have a 102 degree fever. I'm weak, I'm shaking, and I'm 24 hours away from the movie event I've been anxiously awaiting since that crooked TR2N test teaser showed up online after ComicCon. I'm not happy.

After a night of fitful sleep, the fever breaks, and I'm back to normal in the morning. It sadly does not last. By mid afternoon the shakes are back, I'm coughing so badly blood vessels are breaking on my face, and my temperature is creeping back up and I can feel the effects of fever. By this point, it is around 3pm Thursday December 17th, and at 12:01 that night I plan to be in a theater fulfilling my promise to you.

Since I have until midnight, I decide to nap until the very last second before I need to leave to get a decent seat. After all, this is IMAX 3D we're talking about here-not the kind of movie you want to see while sitting way off to the side. It's difficult to sleep, and I'm taking my temperature during my wakeful moments only to find that I'm creeping slowly back up to 102 degrees. 102 degrees is what i'm at when I dress to leave for the theater at 10:30.

I was able to get a very good seat, and the wait wasn't much of a big deal-I watched TRON on my iPod while I waited.

While I was able to watch the midnight show, and the fever broke about 2/3 into the movie, I was completely exhausted when it was all over. Exhausted, and in love with an entirely new movie. I'm sure you're aware of this, but TRON Legacy is wonderful. If it does anything but sweep the technical Oscars I will be shocked. And Daft Punk deserves a best original score Oscar for sure.

I went home and slept. I had taken Friday off from work in anticipation of this late night event, so I was able to sleep for a nice long while. I woke up without fever, but still very very ill, but in decent enough shape to hit the theater for the second of the 4 showings I promised to see. The movie was fantastic the second time, so it wasn't all expectations and being swept up in the event of a midnight show-I truly love this movie.

So more sleep and more sickness fill my weekend to the point where I only feel the ability to be mobile once again sometime Sunday afternoon. At which time I decide to go to the movies and watch viewing 3. This time I was down to earth enough that I cried. This is a very touching movie as well. Although I contemplated going back to the ticket booth and buying another ticket for the next show as soon as it was over, I just couldn't. I had to go home and get into bed and stay there.

I tried to keep my promise to you, Mr. Boxleitner, I truly did. I had every intention and desire to keep this promise. However, fever kept me from doing much of anything, and I was only able to see the movie 3 times opening weekend, not the 4 I'd promised. Now, I did bring my husband with me for 2 of the 3 times, so I suppose technically I am responsible for 5 ticket purchases. However, I still feel as though I've let you down. I hope that being the #1 movie in America for the week of opening weekend cushions your disappointment in me for going back on my word. I'm assuming I'll be seeing it again, and I'll buy the DVD-every version Disney can throw at me, I'll purchase. And I'll be buying more toys, and of course I purchased the soundtrack. I'm doing my best to support TRON. I just can't do much with a fever, I'm sorry.

I look forward to seeing you at future comic book and geek culture conventions. My husband is a frequent convention guest, so I attend them often. You're always welcome to join us for dinner. I promise I will be well with thoroughly washed hands.

Thank you for understanding-


Friday, October 22, 2010

Big Bang=Dead to me

I'm done with the douchebaggery of Big Bang Theory.

This kind of makes me sad, because my tolerance level reached it's limit just in time for Mayim Bialik to be a regular. I love Mayim Bialik.

Anyway, i've always been kind of on the fence about Big Bang Theory because well, I have issues from childhood that make me feel inadequate. I spent many years trying to get the males in my life to consider me a female. I was one of the guys to the point of being genderless. Granted, I wasn't all that into makeup and skirts, so maybe I did bring a little bit of this on myself. But still, I watched boys who had Catalano status in my mind look past me to the girls who were more obvious, but with whom they had nothing in common.

Now, I've always been the type to fall for a mind and the body follows. I'm not saying this is the way everyone should be, but I do think people should keep open minds about what is attractive. Having a "type" with a strict criteria that is never deviated from is never a good thing. Remember, Val once demanded "long blond hair, big green eyes, ass that won't quit and legs that go all the way up", but he married Rhonda, the cute PhD student.

I think Dustin Hoffman tells the best story about this. When speaking about "Tootsie" on the AFI 100 Years of Movies special, he got very serious. He said that when he was being made up to be Dorothy, he told the makeup artists that he wanted to be really pretty. They said no offense, you're a good looking guy, but we can only do so much in making you a woman. He thought about this, and became very ashamed and sad. What upset him was that he thought he made a very interesting woman, and he wondered about all of the interesting women he missed meeting and knowing because he passed them up at parties because they didn't meet is perceived notions of what was acceptably attractive. At this point in his story he stopped talking and smiled, and it was obvious he was trying to keep the tears from coming, and he said "This was not a comedy for me." I of course have about as much respect for a human being as one can have for Dustin Hoffman now because of this. If I ever meet in him in person, I will simply thank him for this story, and try not to hug him.

I first started watching the Big Bang Theory as a Monday night ritual with a very dear friend, so I suppose I will have a soft spot for it for that. But they way the writers slam geek girls on this show is just kind of not cool. Granted, the guys on the show aren't exactly being held up as pillars of society or anything, and I suppose that is the comedy of it. I just don't find it all that funny anymore. We can have a show about how geek guys can be lovable, but geek girls are still freaks. And I know, I've said before, "if I want a show about geek girls, pitch a show!" And that's not necessarily what I want, I just don't want a show that bashes them.

So first season, I let it slide when Leonard said that any woman who would be willing to play laser strip chess wouldn't be someone you want to see naked. And I've never had an issue with Penny. She doesn't have much in common with the guys, but they all get along and enjoy each other because mostly, it's a crew of nice people. She teaches them things, they teach her things, it's fine. And she's cute, but personally I'd be more likely to obsess over someone with whom I shared commonalities other than just being neighbors. But that's just me.

I let the ridiculousness of the Leslie Winkle and Amy Farrah Fowler characters slide too. Not all nerd girls have scientific approaches to social interactions, but I love the actresses who played them that I just let it slide.

But this season, when Stewart the comic shop owner said that his new girlfriend is "terrible" because "when she wants sex she puts on her plus sized wonder woman outfit and says 'who wants to ride my invisible jet'", I was just done tolerating the nerd/geek girl bashing. Oh, how sad for you, Stuart! You met a woman at SDCC who likes what you like and shares your interests! What a tragedy that she doesn't have the stereotypically perfect body! Because you could have your pick of women with your gangly frame flowbie haircut. I don't know how you keep the supermodels from disrupting your business!

This is in no way meant to insult Kevin Sussman, the actor who plays Stuart. But I think most people would agree with me that he's not the kind of guy you'd expect to see in Cosmo's Guy With No Shirt pictorial. He's a perfectly fine looking person, appears to have good hygiene, and according to the imdb he actually did work at a comic shop before he was an actor professionally. So he seems cool enough, and there is nothing wrong with him. I'm only picking on him because the character Stuart looks like him. The character who by the way, preferred a debate with Sheldon over sex with Penny. Just sayin'.

Anyway, I'm sick of this "watch our show about these lovable nerdy geeky boys, but ewww, nerdy geeky girls are freaks and mutants and should never be considered for dating purposes ever!" message that the show seems to have. I'm not saying the show needs to change, I'm just saying I don't like it because of this, so I'm not watching it anymore. It's off the DVR.

To be fair, I'm not a big fan of people in real life thinking they have some right to judge others by looks. While I'll admit to judging people by their hygiene skills, I've never not wanted to know someone or checked someone off a list of possible date candidates due to the fact they they have extra pounds or because they aren't Jude Law clones. And yes, perhaps I don't do this because I know how terrible it is as it has been done to me. I may be heavy, but I'm far from hideous. And let's be honest, if we want to get specific, we can find faults about everyone. You can pick anyone apart and find flaws in everyone's appearance-she has thick ankles, he has a unibrow, she has a hook nose, his back is hairy....this game is never ending.

So all I'm saying is this-stereotyping someone is bad, but shutting someone out of your radar based on the fact that they don't look like a Photoshopped model is almost worse. I'm not saying get the ugly girl to marry you or hook up with someone who you don't find attractive for the cause. I'm just saying keep a broad horizon on what is attractive. That shlubby nerd guy? He might be the best kisser you've ever known. That pleasantly plump girl? Look at her eyes, I'll bet they are beautiful. Does that skinny guy have your favorite movies on his shelf, as well as numerous cds by your favorite band and a sign for your chosen candidate in your yard? Maybe that woman who has the sweet smile but never wears makeup loves the same authors you do. You just never know unless you look with both eyes and look longer than a glance. And yeah, maybe a heavy girl might not look like Lynda Carter in a Wonder Woman costume, but she might be very skilled with that lasso, so hey....

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Lessons Learned, Part 2

Life lesson #482-Just because you remember someone doesn't mean they'll remember you. Actually, they'll probably think you're someone they've never seen before.

Sunday, June 27, 2010

Lessons Learned

After a day of garage sale shopping yesterday with my friends Juice and Ashley, I realized something. I realized that most people's houses are full of crap. Some people have a houses full of fascinating, good quality things like teak furniture and bakelite jewelry, but most of us have all kinds of things we just don't use anymore, never used in the first place, or can't figure out why we bought them in the first place. Ironically, a lot of it comes from garage sales, but I digress.

While my house contains some cool stuff, it also contains a bunch of stuff that is simply taking up space. Lately, I've been learning that it's best to limit the amount of crap that comes into the house. I've been doing this by canceling my Amazon Prime membership, avoiding the $1 Spot at Target, and saving my Dave and Buster's ticket points until I'm well into the thousands. One thing I don't need is another infestation of stuffed Pokemon, a condition with which I was afflicted in the late 90s.

This whole selective purchases thing is just one lesson that it's taken me 34 years to learn. When I was a kid money burned a hole in my pocket like it was a supernova. I would buy things just to have something to buy. Once my personality developed, I became slightly more selective, but not much. My weakness was always records. Or tapes, or CDs, depending on the decade. There was a time in my life when a large music collection was more important than a quality music collection. This led to my owning copies of Information Society's "Hack" and Led Zeppelin's "Presence". These days, although I will put up with the occasional 2.5 star album simply because it was the latest by a band I love, I'm no longer one to buy something that I've heard something about just to add to the collection. That's what iTunes gift cards are for.

When it comes to other types of household items, I'm very much one to hang onto things because I "might need it someday". And this can include "I can make something out of that". These are both slippery slopes. I'm learning that as an adult living a world with internet and being able to drive, the need to find things to fill the hours is less and less. I seem to have outgrown the concept of boredom, so the need to hoard rainy day activities is gone. I also have realized that "someday" is like tomorrow, it never comes. Anything that you think you may need someday is going to be obsolete eventually, and just take up space.

Nostalgia is also something that I am learning is a slippery slope. While it may be cool for a second to dig up an old piece of computer or video game equipment, it gets harder and harder to justify keeping something that is never used. This is why I no longer have my original Game Boy. I'm not going to play something that isn't backlit and requires 4 AA batteries.

This all relates to my garage sale experience in that I realized while looking through tables and tables of stuff I didn't want, it was stuff that was familiar. Aka, I had a lot of similar stuff. And I thought about why i should keep something that if today I saw it on a card table in a driveway with a $.25 sticker on it, I would keep driving. I couldn't come up with a reason why, and today I spent the afternoon getting rid of a bunch of stuff that I just don't use, or in some cases, completely forgot I owned. And it felt good. It will feel good to not have to dust, launder, organize, find a place for, put back, make room for, find a use for, move around, or pay attention to this stuff ever again. As I get to the point where my house is full of things I absolutely love, I'm glad I'm learning this lesson now and not when I'm 90. While it would be nice to be that guy Mark Hamill played in that one episode of Amazing Stories, I'd rather not have to wait until I'm old and grey to have a crazy profitable auction. I should just save my money now and not buy crap.

So here are some things I've learned that I hope to never forget:

-If you aren't using it, you won't use it.
-If you forget why you are keeping it, you don't need to.
-Just because it's 3 for $15 doesn't mean you have to buy 3 bottles of lotion. Especially since when you already have 5 full bottles of lotion at home.
-When you find yourself getting sucked in to the $1 Spot at Target, remember the old adage "You get what you pay for."
-If you wouldn't look twice at it at full price, you don't need to own it at 75% off.
-BOGO is only useful if you need 2 of something. Or if it applies to food for a party.
-Nothing that was ever worth money one day was thought to have been worth money one day at the time it was originally purchased. An item marked "Special Collector's Edition" is like explaining a joke-not worth it. Collect something only if you like it, not as a retirement plan.
-If you do plan on saving things, invest in Rubbermaid.
-Unless you are part of a family of 4 or more, do not buy anything perishable in bulk.

And one lesson that I've finally learned that has nothing do do with anything I've already talked about:
-You will love yourself in the morning if you choose an outfit the night before.


It's been almost 4 months since I've blogged? I suck at this. And right now it's 3:30 in the morning so i won't be blogging right now either.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Johnny Come Lately

So which is worse? Me getting into The (American) Office just in time to see Jim and Pam have a baby, or watching Degrassi-The Next Generation?

Sometimes I come late to things. I wonder if i'm less of a geek because of it. I came late to the new Doctor Who (well not really, I watched it at first, then got behind-same deal with the new Battlestar Galactica), Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I've yet to see one episode of Caprica. I also tend to get way behind on shows I like, for instance Supernatural. I'm shamefully behind on that.

And now I'm starting to feel weird about blogging about TV I've never seen. I'm conflicted between thinking I could be using this time to watch more TV, and thinking that I need to stop watching TV so I have something to talk about.

Monday, February 15, 2010

40 Days

Lent begins this week. Am I Catholic? No. Do I do Lent? Yes. Why? Because I believe in the concept of slowly removing bad things from your life, and during Lent is a good time because a lot of people are removing things from their lives, and during that adjustment period, misery loves company. Or safety in numbers, pick your cliche.

This year my plan is to give up beef. It started out as ground beef, because I recently ate a dish with ground beef that had a bone in it about the size of a grain of rice. It put me right the hell off beef, so I thought the timing was good. I've been wanting to stop eating so much meat again, and I figured this would be a good gradual transition. I'm also trying to lose weight (what else is new) and I figure no beef=less fast food. I'm not a huge fan of fast food chicken, but the whole fish sandwich thing could threaten to be my downfall.

I used to be a vegetarian. Well, no, I wasn't. I didn't eat fleshy bits, but I did eat soups and such made with chicken or beef stock. And honestly, I felt a lot better. I ate a lot of cheese, but I still felt better. I didn't get sick as much, and I didn't eat nearly as much fast food. Because really, what fast food is there for a non-meat eater? Fries, salad with the chicken picked off, or Taco Bell. And let's be honest, Taco Bell is mean to me now that I am in my 30s.

I'd like to get back to this fast foodless life. I find myself thinking about fast food as a net, like no matter how busy or late it gets, I can always hit the 24 hour McDonalds. It's so funny how McDonalds used to be the best thing in the world to me (Quarter Pounder w/cheese, fries and an orange drink) and now I can barely stand up after I eat it.

So anyway, Lent. No beef. Here's hoping it will last past Easter.

Worlds Colliding

I work in the corporate world. As such, the real me does not get nearly as much of chance to come out as it had while managing a music department, even though this particular music department was in a large corporate big box store. One of my coworkers commented recently that "you don't find a lot of people like me in corporate America", and either a) he's right, or b) no one finds the opportunity to show their true selves at work. Which honestly, is probably a good thing. The workplace is often full of traitors.

Today I went to lunch with 2 of my coworkers, and while we were there Joe Jackson's "Is She Really Going Out With Him?" came on the stereo system. When I heard this, I felt very comfortable, as if an old friend just came up to the table and sat down, but also uneasy because since I was with work people, I wasn't able to focus any attention on this old friend. I work with great people, but I don't exactly feel like mentioning that one of my fondest memories is being in a bar in New York on my 21st birthday with 2 dear friends, listening to the band play mostly covers, including this very song. I also wasn't going to tell the story of seeing Joe Jackson on my birthday in Pittsburgh, then spending the following day shopping in book and record stores before the drive home, during which I ate a Sheetz hamburger on pretzel bread and found a Nittany Lions Pez dispenser.

Sometimes I try to tell stories at work, and it's obvious by their faces that no one cares. No one cares about how nice Ray Park is, or how Lou Ferrigno shoved me, or how well Dirk Benedict plays the piano, or how I was able to find a new Pez dispenser over the weekend, or what shows I'm planning on seeing. I think this is why I love conventions so much-I feel very comfortable there since people understand me. Once at a convention, a friend asked me and Chris "Hey, I've been meaning to ask you guys, is your cat named after that one Twilight Zone episode?" I almost cried. It was so nice to be understood.

Saturday, February 13, 2010

I hate it when they're right.....

Many years ago, when I was a senior in high school, I had a boyfriend. Well, I THOUGHT he was a boyfriend, but Chris Rock later explained to me that I was in fact, not his girlfriend. Anyway, I dated this guy before I could drive, as I didn't drive until I was in college that winter.

One night I was talking to him on the phone, and I expressed excitement at the fact that snow had been predicted for that evening. Even though I had long outgrown playing in the snow and sledding (fun activities, but unless you can guarantee me a completely waterproof outfit and that i won't sled over a rock, I'll just hang back and watch you do it), but I loved to just watch snow. I still find watching falling snow extremely calming, as the change in barometric pressure tends to make things very still and quiet.

After I expressed my excitement, he said to me "Do you know WHY you like snow? Because you don't drive. Once you start to drive, you'll hate it as much as I do"

He expressed his interest to not ever see me again in September, so he was long gone by the next snow. I drove in the snow for the first time in the winter of 1994, in my first car, a 1988 Dodge Omni, which were small little cars. And as I dug my way out of the white blocks of frozen precipitation and drove on the roads lined with boulders of blackened slush and snow, and slid on the bridges and pumped my brakes, watched daredevils swerve around as they passed others as if the roads were as dry as the Sahara, and squinted to see out of the thin strip of clear glass on my windshield which was so small due to my frozen and warped windshield wipers, I got very angry.

I was angry because I forced to admit that he was right. I was beginning to hate the snow. Dammit.

As an adult, snow becomes and obstacle - something you have to shovel rather than something you get to play in. And I've yet to have a job that offers snow days. Once I worked for a store that closed during a level 2 snow emergency, but I'd already driven there by the time this was decided, so that doesn't count.

But I will say this. If I remember to buy bread, milk, toilet paper and cat food before the snow hits, and all I have to do is be at home staying warm, I will open my front curtains and watch the snow fall, and I'll still find it very peaceful. And I still love that.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

You know what? To hell with this!

Here's the deal-

I have a job. I'm going to be 34 soon. I can't have caffeine. I enjoy beadwork and reading. So what does all of this mean? I don't want to blog every night.

Also, there are days when I get up, go to work, come home, have dinner, read a little, and go to bed. Big deal. This is the curse of being an adult. And i don't particularly feel like blogging about drinking too much then playing Mario on the weekend.

So I've decided this New Year's Resolution bores me, and I'd like to do something else. Like read 4 books a month. Let's try that one, and maybe i'll blog a book report.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

You Totally Rule, Morbo.....

....I totally already know that!

When I'm tired, like I am right now, it's becomes obvious to those around me because I talk in quotes. For some reason my brain ceases to have the ability to come up with it's own original thoughts, but can summon up a pre-recorded thought that fits the situation. It's like having an episode of a usually live show ready to rerun in case something goes wrong with the production. Like I have standby thoughts.

One of my favorite books is "The Mysterious Flame Of Queen Loana" by Umberto Eco. It is about an antiquarian bookseller who suffers memory loss after a car accident, and his memory comes back to him in literary passages and quotes. Books and lines from books jog his memory, and I remember thinking when I read it that if I ever suffered memory loss, mine would trickle back in a similar fashion. And damn, I need to read more.

Loveliness Is A Woman's Obligation And Reward

Tonight after work I went for drinks with some women who work in my office. I've worked at home so long that I've completely forgotten what it's like to hang out with co-workers. I had fun, and as I was driving home, I heard "Wonderful Tonight" by Eric Clapton. Now, I'm not much of a Clapton fan, but I like this song, as I think everyone does. Well, most girls do. And as I listened to it, I felt very sad. Sad because I will never inspire that kind of song, as cheesy as it is.

Janeane Garafalo once said in a stand up act that all she could think of while watching the scene in "Chasing Amy" where Ben Affleck tells Joey Lauren Adams how he feels about her in the rain that this would never happen to her. No guy would ever say that kind of stuff to her, and if he did, she'd be a little freaked out because she would not understand why he liked her so much. I think this is how I feel about songs like this. As much as I want to be beautiful and inspiring and amazing, it's just not going to happen. Why? Because if I wanted it that bad, I'd wear makeup more often and pay more attention to my hair.

I remember watching "Blade Runner" at a sci fi marathon (oh geez) 15 years ago. As I was watching the scene where Harrison Ford was throwing around and grabbing and planting very hard kisses on Sean Young (and this is sick of me because basically, this is as close to robot rape as you're gonna get outside of Anime), I started to cry. Like REALLY cry. I was in a crowded theater so I was quiet, but I was quivering. My poor friend Steve was sitting next to me and was trying to ask me what was wrong, but I just didn't know how to explain that I was crying because no one would ever have that much of a desire to kiss me. You can't explain that kind of thing to boys.

I'm not sure where I'm going with this point, or if I have a point. It's just odd to me how cheesy love songs by musicians I don't really care about can make me feel all "I wish I was that girl in the song!" Do you ever outgrow the feeling of wishing a love song is about you?

And honestly, when it comes to men singing about their women at a party, I much prefer Nick Lowe's "Let's Stay In And Make Love". I prefer Nick Lowe's ANYTHING to a Clapton song.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010


I've been shopping at The Body Shop since 1991, back when Ms. Roddick was running the show. And I've seen a lot of my favorite products come and go. Kiwi lip balm, chamomile mask, and that shaving cream for men that smells like pumpkin pie are just a few. And while they haven't brought this stuff back, they recently brought back an old line, including Dewberry, Ice Blue, Cucumber, and Carrot.

I always liked Dewberry, so I stopped at the mall tonight after work to grab some. I was unprepared for the flood of memories the scent of it would bring down upon me. I smelled the tester, and automatically, it was 1991 again. I felt like I was in high school again, and I almost cried. It was such an amazing sensation. I usually get transported by sounds, not scents, but this did it to me big time. All I could think of was that time, and who I knew then, and I could almost touch that year. It was incredible. So incredible that I bought 3 bottles of Dewberry bath gel.

Who the hell gets nostalgic about bath gel? Interesting culture I live in that I am totally into this.

My husband went across the mall to the Penney's to spend a gift card, and when I went to find him Sting's "Why Should I Cry For You" was on the in store music system. I got "The Soul Cages", the album this song is on, for Christmas, 1991. Talk about completing the illusion.

Sometimes I wish I could go back in time and make the most out of all the chances I had back then. Other times I realize I did what I did to become who I am now, and aside from the fat surrounding me, I like that I am who I am. But if I do feel like time traveling, I have those 3 bottles of Dewberry.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Desert Island Discs Revisited

Last year, I did a post about the whole idea of Desert Island Discs, which is basically a way to list albums you just love and are the person who you are because of them. The question again is if you were on a desert island, assuming you had food and water for the rest of your life but were stuck somehow miraculously with electricity, which albums would you want with you? I posted a good list, but the other night I was playing Lego Rock Band, and "Free Fallin'" is one of the tracks. As I was singing it, I thought, was this on my desert island discs list? Well, I just re-read it, and it's not, so I've decided to add to it. And assuming I'm the only one on the island, I probably have enough space for a lot of albums.

Full Moon Fever, Tom Petty
I saw Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers for the first time in 1995 with my friends Jason, Shelley, Beth, and Seth. Before the show, Jason asked me how many encores I thought he would do, and what the last song would be. I thought about it and I said "Well, there IS this song at the end of Full Moon Fever called "Alright For Now" that is like a lullabye, and I think that would be super cool. I doubt it though, it's kind of obscure and not a Heartbreakers song." And guess what the last song was of that night? It was amazing, I cried. My friends gave me this album for my 14th birthday, and I played it to death. It's still one of my favorites.

Graceland, Paul Simon
I felt so grown up when I bought this record. Paul Simon was/is such an icon of American music, and I felt like I really was learning something about being a grown up when I bought this in the 5th grade. As an only child, I didn't have kids around or older siblings to look up to, so I couldn't wait to be an adult. Any time I was seen as older than I was, or did things adults did I felt like I was on my way to being a grown-up. And I still think being an adult, for all of the bad sides of it, is pretty damn cool. You can drive, stay up late and eat ice cream, order pizza whenever you want, and if you budget, you can buy whatever toys you want.
Anyway, this album was recently re-released, and I finally replaced my old cassette with a cd, and I still love this album. "Crazy Love, Part 2" was always one of my favorites, but there isn't a bad one in the bunch. Carrie Fisher said in her autobiography, "How could I not love the man who wrote 'Medicine is magical and magical is art, think of the boy in the bubble and the baby with the baboon heart'? The answer is I couldn't not love that man." I think a lot of people believe that it is just impossible to not love Paul Simon. Personally, I can't not love the man who wrote "Hey Senorita, that's astute, I said. Why don't we get together and call ourselves an institute?"

Powerslave, Iron Maiden
This album contains "2 Minutes To Midnight". I really don't need to say much more than that.

Switched On Bach, Wendy Carlos
I love the Moog. Love it. And I love Bach, so Wendy Carlos' album of Bach pieces done on the Moog is one of my favorite things ever. I love all of Wendy's work, from her fantastic Kubrick soundtracks to the version of "Peter and the Wolf" that she did with "Weird" Al Yankovic, but this album holds a special place for me. It was one of those albums that at the time it was released was a bit of a novelty, but Wendy's musicianship prevents it from being one of those flash in the pan records that everyone had and everyone sold at their garage sale. She is an amazing woman, and if anything rivals her musical talent it is her talent for eclipse photography. Seriously.

Titanic Days, Kirsty MacColl
Kirsty is my favorite female musician of all time, and really, all of her albums would need to come with me to a desert island, but this was the album that I first heard of hers, so it's special. "You And Me Baby" is one of my all time favorites, and as weird as "Titanic Days" and "Can't Stop Killing You" can seem, this album is amazing. I can't say enough wonderful things about Kirsty. My feelings about her run from respect, admiration, jealously, love, grief. If I keep talking about her, I'll never stop.

An Open Letter to Alfred Matthew Yankovic

Hello Al-
I recently caught the episode of Shatner's Raw Nerve with you as the guest. I'm a huge fan of yours, and as such I've learned a lot about you over the years through other interviews and Biography episodes, and even The Compleat Al. And although that episode with Shatner had to be extremely difficult for you, I wanted to let you know how much I appreciated your being open and honest in telling your story.

Let me first say that when your parents passed away, my heart broke for you. I can imagine, but really don't want to, the pain you went through, and I'm sure still feel from such an epic loss. And I think your experience hit home with me not as a fan feeling sympathy for someone she admires, but more from the aspect of one only child to another.

I am the only child of parents who are still married and who live 5 minutes away. I've always been extremely close to them, and I've been lucky enough to be the child of people who let me grow up so now that I am an adult, my parents are like friends, too. Even as a very young child, the thought of losing them terrified me. I think only children don't have that "us against them" with their parents the way a family with parents and siblings do, and as such I think we tend to have a different bond with our parents.

I remember thinking when it happened that if I were to lose my parents in a similar way, it would almost be easier knowing that I only had to go through the pain once, rather than a first and second time. But something you said on Shatner really got to me, and that was that you felt there was some blessing in the fact that their dying together meant that one of them would never have to live without the other. I agreed with that, and I think I would feel the same solace.

Thank you so much for sharing such a terrible moment of your life with the world, and with other onlys who may have lost their parents, or who still have that as their worst fear.

Thank you,


Fenton, shut up!

So I caved.

I was so pissed that Glee (yes, Glee) was going on hiatus because of American Idol that my plan was to boycott this season of Idol. But I watched it anyway, and I'm glad I did, because I got to see Andrew Fenton. He was this year's nasty guy, and he's the one who kinda looked like Clark Kent. And just the fact that his name was Fenton reminded me of Fenton from Home Movies. And of course, Coach McGirk saying "Fenton, shut up! Shut up! You apologize to your mother, and you apologize to all these people!"

Home Movies was done by the same people who did Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist, which is one of my all time favorite shows. It was an animated show centered around Dr. Katz, who was a therapist to comedians or actors, so the therapy sessions were based on their standup acts. And the actors who were on were extremely funny, especially David Duchovny. Just him saying "Bubbleiscious" is hilarious. But my favorite Dr. Katz guest was Ray Romano. He was so funny on that show, and his episodes are great. I loved him so much that when I found out he was going to have a sitcom, I was really excited. And of course, that sitcom turned out to be Everybody Loves Raymond, so therefore I was sorely disappointed.

No offense, Ray Romano. I'm fully aware that this is one more sitcom than I'll ever have, I just don't like he said/she said comedy or family dysfunction.

Ray Romano has a new show, an hour long drama with the occasional chuckle called "Men Of A Certain Age". I'm of course watching it because it also stars Scott Bakula, who I'm sorry, I just love. I never got into Enterprise, but I love Scott Bakula. I even have "Somewhere In The Night" on my iPod. Anyway, Andre Braugher is in it too, and it's a surprisingly good show. The Ray Romano character is separated from his wife and just starting to date again, and the most recent episode is his first date with a woman the Scott Bakula character set him up with. And during the date, they are cracking jokes, and I was thinking "wow, that's pretty funny. He's clever!" And then I thought to myself, oh yeah, he IS a comedian!

I forget things sometimes.

Monday, January 11, 2010

Mr. Plow

Jingles. As annoying as they are, they are genius. For example, who doesn't know the Mr. Plow jingle? It's not even a real commercial!

The reason I find them genius is the reason I find pop songs genius. There is a certain genius to be able to write a song that half the population hates, but everyone knows the words to. Jingles are the same thing. For example, there are various websites that occasionally post commercials from the 80s or 90s, and it AMAZES me how i still know the lyrics. Like why do I know the Big Red song? Or Crispy Critters? Why is that still in my head!? See? Genius.

Fuckin' Football

I'm not going pretend that I like football. I don't like it. I find it boring, and I've lived near Ohio State long enough to really dislike what it does to people. I don't particularly like jocks, and this stems from going to a football game when I was in the 8th grade and seeing a group of steakheads try to stomp the life out of a small bunny rabbit who was just unlucky enough to find himself on a football field. As if the bunny did something to them. And I'm sick of being told that it's okay in this culture to obsess over football and nothing else. Someday when I feel like looking for it, I will repost the letter to the editor I wrote bitching about how the paper made fun of Star Wars fans, but says nothing about the tailgaters who wait outside longer before the game than the Star Wars fans waited for the movie to start.

And I don't like how football makes me miss The Simpsons.

Not that there is anything wrong with people who do enjoy football. I'm always on the side of obsessive fandom, whatever it is. Just don't tell me I'm an idiot for liking what I like, because when you think about it, you are just like me. Explain to me how putting on a jersey that looks like an official jersey and playing football in the yard at halftime is NOT cosplay.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

01.10.10 Revisited

This one will be short, not because I'm trying to cheat on my whole 2 blogs a day for the next 10 days thing, but because I'm doing this without my glasses. And the longer I can't see, the more pissed off I get at everything/everyone. I was telling Juice last night that not being able to pee when you have to is just second to not knowing where my glasses are and thus, not being able to see to find them on my list of top annoyances. I've tried the whole put them in the same place every time you take them off thing, but I can't make that strong of a commitment.

Also, Chris and I are going to go to Half Price Books today. We went through our books and found some stuff that we can get rid of, basically to make more room for stuff we'd rather have. I've always thought that it is the duty of the intelligent person to have a house full of books, and that the bookless home is a sure sign of someone who has uttered the phrase "Why are you reading that? What, was it assigned to you?" Granted this is judgmental, but I've been proven right a few times. A friend of mine said someone was in his house once, looked around at the shelving and said "Wow, y'all sure do got a lot of books."

Yet today has changed my mind. First of all, with the internet, a million reference books are so not necessary. And also, there is this thing called the library which honestly, people do not use enough, so even if you don't have books, as long as you have a library card, you've proven that you find reading to be important, which is really the key point here. But after going through my books, I'm starting to think that it's not intelligent people who have lots of books, but also people who enjoy dusting and the company of silverfish.

Already late 1.10.10

So i'm 10, count 'em, 10 days behind on this daily blog thing. Today is January 10, so already i suck. I figured a good way to remedy this is to do 2 blogs a day for the next 10 days, that should do it.

I don't think I did a blog on New Year's Day because I worked 15 hours on New Year's Eve. Not strenuous, just long. And how did I spend my New Year's Day? Flipping between the Doctor Who and Twilight Zone marathons, while Chris was asleep on the sofa, sick. And thanks to this work schedule and Chris being sick, we missed a party.

Usually, considering the fact that I have social anxiety disorder, missing a party usually makes me feel relieved. But this year, I was really looking forward to this party. It was held by our friends Chris and Molly, who I frankly don't spend enough time with. And last night, I had a dream that proved this to me. I dreamt that all of my friends who I love but never see were all together at this theater/bar/apartment building. We all mingled around, watched a play, and drank amaretto sours. I've never had an amaretto sour, but the point still remains, I need to see more of the other geeks in my life.